Welcome to ‘The Lost Tales of the Soho Asylum – The Man With The Plastic Fish’.
Soho Asylum had sporadically operated at the fringes of London’s Soho club culture over 40 years ago.
The ‘events’ mainly occured in Soho’s Greek Street although some ex-inmates have stated it twice occured in an abandoned Covent Garden basement.
There are no invites, no flyers and no entrance fee… there is also no telling when and where the next one would take place or what kind of ‘occasion’ it would be. Some have said it would last 3 days while others have said it could blow itself out in 8 hours.
This is what we know from one of our interviewees. Kevin Wallgrab.
What was Soho Asylum? Give us your first impressions.
“Going through the door, I was greeted by various strange characters. Some were dressed in what I can only describe as dazzling monk’s robes, some looked like they were extras from a David Bowie video and others looked… just weird! The word asylum was very apt for this! There seemed to be a hierarchy of some sort, some sort of order to the madness” People were bowing all over the place and this guy dressed as a waiter kept throwing this black powder stuff as everyone. I had no idea what the hell was going on!”
What about the music?
“There was a resident DJ and MC who spun your nut through a never ending sequence of damaged, scratched and warped vinyl blasts. One second it was French, then out of nowhere it morphed into a psychedelic tirade. Heavy beats and dance grooves backed everything these headcases did. There were antiquated tape machines everywhere as well as a selection of sweet drum machines. It was an unholy mix of early 1980’s live hip-hop, New Romantic on speed, Dub music and a sprinkling of soundtracks from obscure films no-one had ever heard of.”
How did you get in?
“I tried to get into the ‘Le Beat Route’ club in Greek Street but the queue was way too long. I was then approached by a really tall man wearing checkered flares and Spats! He gave me a a small plastic fish and told me to display it on my shirt, so I did. Then, as I hung around, another strange looking guy approached me and asked where I got the fish from. I can’t say what happened next but before I knew it I was led down some stairs…”
It seems like you were hand picked?
“Seems so!”
Excerpt courtesy of K. Wallgrab. Full transcript to be released at a later date.
EPISODE ONE – INTRODUCTION
EPISODE TWO – DISTORTIONS
EPISODE THREE – ILLUMINATIONS
EPSIODE FOUR – THE VENGEFUL FIST OF CHAN
EPISODE FIVE – SOTERIUS
EPISODE SIX – OLD HAG
EPISODE SEVEN – MY PRIVATE DIARY
EPISODE EIGHT – DONKEY JACKET
EPISODE NINE – FIFTY BIG ONES
EPISODE TEN – WRAPPING UP